I have been asked a few times what do I want from this upcoming (actually already started) year, and this question by itself was anyways buzzing in the back of my brain.It is known that this is the usual evaluation period, new year starts, bla-bla....however I do not think this is the real reason for me. I guess rather my visit home made me think deeply on how I have been living my life in Jordan, what am I actually taking out of it.
Not that anyone have really challenged me on this matter, but going home and basically only thinking that I have missed home so much had a decent impact on me. I have never been the super “home-sitting” kind of guy, but it did feel different this time.
While such thinking makes it easier to make choices for the far future (far meaning that what is after this one year). But what struck me is that I have not been thinking of “today”, I have not been up to the challenge to take the best out of the time I have hear in Jordan…and that is not me, I have always been able to turn things around, even sometimes against all odds. Well I guess my good common sense took a break for the last 2 months. Good, or I shall curse myself? Nah, none of them are solutions, so it is better to simply change and do get back on course (what exactly would be the sense of sitting in the corner of my room, bored and being all down because of random, stupid reasons???)Today even my horoscope (starsign, or whatever it is properly called in English) says that I shall change
Sokat foglalkoztatják a jövő tervei. Nehéz lesz a régi életformától és egy kedves alaktól búcsút venni, de a változás az új élet kezdetét is jelenti. (Your mind is full of the plans for your future. It is going to be hard to say good bye to your old way of life and to say farewell to a person dear to you, but change means the start of a new life)
Though I do not believe in the stars giving me a destiny (I don’t even believe in destiny, haha), but today’s one is pretty accurate with leaving Hungary again for 9 months just a day before and having too much time in the Cairo airport to think :)
So enough of the philosophy, how shall I name 2010? It shall be
the year of growing up….Some might ask if I’m not grown up enough to my age. I think I’m. But I have not been using this advantage, I have not been really taking my life in my hands, and now it is time to do it on an every day level, starting with the smallest habits of what I’m doing when I get back home from work.
And the point of it is to actually accept what I have, who I’m…and to truly appreciate and be ready to go ahead with it.
This is my direction for 2010. While it have been broken down into those usual details I use, I do not want to bore any of you….it is already an unusually philosophical and long post :)
May you also have a meaningful 2010!
(the pictures on the side were taken during my recent visit home)
(Random note: growing yup does not mean that I can not turn that that crazy idiot who sometimes I am :))
